Are we a fit?

Are we a fit?

When you can tell someone is being real,
something in you knows it.
Where do you feel that in yourself?

When you can tell someone is being real,
something in you knows it.
Where do you feel that in yourself?

I made this page so you can feel, before we ever talk,
whether this work is for you. Take your time with it.

Sound improv turning a Noise face into a Poise face

This unique and effective sound practice helps you move from noise to poise, and go about your day with more ease and grace.

THE HONEST ANSWER

I know. This sounds like a leap.

I know. This sounds like a leap.

You may think sound improv would just be an escape, or extra-curricular, or maybe unrealistic and impractical.

I get it.  People ask me all the time: how does piano improv help with deciding a career move, or what to do about a relationship?

Here is the honest answer. Almost every real decision in your life, a job change, a hard conversation, what to do for a kid who is struggling, gets made with inadequate information. You are stepping into unknown territory without enough to go on. That is exactly what happens when you sit down to improvise. Especially if you have never played before, because then it is all unknown.

So the piano becomes a low-stakes place to practice being you in the unknown. Your patterns show up where you can actually see them. You discover something simple, like slow down, play one note instead of six, and it works. And then that same afternoon, in a conversation that matters, you remember the feeling of it. Not because someone told you. Because you found it yourself, in your body.

Give me a couple of minutes and I will say more about how and why this works.

For gifted, capable people who sense something is off

Does any of this sound like you?

Does any of this sound like you?

  • You get overwhelmed and anxious trying to keep it all together.

  • You feel torn between how things look on the outside and how you feel on the inside.

  • You feel out of tune with your own nature, and you cannot quite figure out what is going on.

  • You are too cautious and indecisive on the big things, and overreactive and impulsive on the small ones.

  • You would give a lot to finally get out of your own way, so you could actually trust, respect, and feel good about the person in the mirror.

  • You are at a crossroads. A career change, a divorce, a newly empty nest, retirement. You have some time now, but time feels more precious than ever.

  • You get overwhelmed and anxious trying to keep it all together.

  • You feel torn between how things look on the outside and how you feel on the inside.

  • You feel out of tune with your own nature, and you cannot quite figure out what is going on.

  • You are too cautious and indecisive on the big things, and overreactive and impulsive on the small ones.

  • You would give a lot to finally get out of your own way, so you could actually trust, respect, and feel good about the person in the mirror.

  • You are at a crossroads. A career change, a divorce, a newly empty nest, retirement. You have some time now, but time feels more precious than ever.

If you recognized yourself more than once in that list, keep reading. This could be for you.

What I help with

What brings people here

What brings people here

Most of the people I work with come carrying some version of one of these.

Overwhelm and anxiety

Overwhelm and anxiety

You spend too much of the day just deleting emails you will never open. You snapped at the people you love again, after promising last week you would not. You wake in the night wondering if you can hold it all together. You hardly feel at home in your own skin anymore.

Something that has become more escape than presence

Something that has become more escape than presence

It can be almost anything. Screens, news, food, shopping, working out, a drink, scrolling. Not because any of these is bad, but because somewhere along the way it stopped being a choice and started being a way out.

A major life transition

A major life transition

A job or career change. A separation or divorce. An empty nest. Retirement. It can feel like the bottom dropped out and you are not sure which way is up. Like you are flailing to find your way, and nothing is certain, and you are not even sure what you want.

Wanting to show up well in the world

Wanting to show up well in the world

You care about what is happening and you want to make a difference, but you are not sure how to use your time and energy. You wish you could have more honest conversations across real differences without adding to the noise. You want to bring your voice to the public square from a place of integrity, not reactivity.

And, no, it is not unrelated. Have you always thought it would feel good to sit down at a piano and actually make it sing?

You can find your flow again. Your confidence, your spontaneity, your playfulness, and yes, your own innate genius. It is fun and rewarding in all sorts of ways. For life.

KINDRED SPIRITS

I have a soft spot for people who...

I have a soft spot for people who...

...remember where they were when they first heard The Köln Concert, and how Keith Jarrett stretched the boundaries of what felt possible and made the world more wondrous.

We would get along great if...

We would get along great if...

you get the importance of knowing where your towel is, and as you read this sentence you think, "I need to pull the Hitchhiker's Guide four-book trilogy back out again."

Or if you were always there for the next Monty Python's Flying Circus (or The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin, or Good Neighbors).

We would be simpatico if...

We would be simpatico if...

whenever you think of Mark Nepo or David Whyte or Rumi or Hafiz, you remember a time their words helped you through a dark time.

And if you have the one and only Willis Alan Ramsey record (or anything by Uncle Walt's Band), we're good.

We could be a good fit if...

We could be a good fit if...

when you march in the streets and chant with thousands of others, you feel the joy of being part of something healthy that is bigger than you, and you like bringing your presence, your passion, and your voice to the public square.

And there is a special place in my heart for...

And there is a special place in my heart for...

anyone who has ever been at a party, watched someone sit down and improvise something beautiful, and thought, "I want to know what that feels like before I die."

the vitals

What it honestly takes

What it honestly takes

Here is what it honestly takes. Not to scare you off. So you can say yes with your eyes open.

You are willing to invest in yourself

You are willing to invest in yourself

You can put real resources toward this over the course of our work together, and you are ready to commit to a process that unfolds over time rather than overnight. We can talk through the specifics on a call.

You are willing to keep a daily practice

You are willing to keep a daily practice

A short reflective practice most days, where you express and examine your own thoughts and feelings through sound. You understand that changing old patterns and growing new ones takes time, and you are willing to give it that time.

You have an instrument you love the sound of

You have an instrument you love the sound of

An acoustic piano or an electronic keyboard that sounds good to your ears and feels good to play. For some of the work, a hand drum you love, a djembe or conga works well. If you do not love the sound and feel of your instrument, this process will not work.

You can handle the basic tech

You can handle the basic tech

Reliable internet and the ability to meet on a video call, and to get into the online courses and community when you want them.

You are willing to venture into uncomfortable territory

You are willing to venture into uncomfortable territory

You are open to a practice built to help you operate skillfully in unknown territory. You can feel and sit with discomfort when it arises, name the emotional blocks that come up so we can work through them together, and you are just as willing to let in surprise, grace, joy, and expansion when those arise too.

what helps

What makes it go better

What makes it go better

None of these are required. They just make the whole thing go better.

You are aware the unconscious is in the room

You are aware the unconscious is in the room

You know that old patterns, much of them out of view, shape a lot of what you think and do. A good part of the value here is learning to meet those parts of yourself with compassion and curiosity rather than judgment.

You lean toward learning and growth

You lean toward learning and growth

You take it as a working truth that experiences, people, and ways of thinking and behaving are temporary, that you can change and grow, and so you are willing to try things outside your comfort zone.

You can set yourself up to play freely

You can set yourself up to play freely

It helps to have the support of the people you live with, and time alone for your practice. At first you may not want anyone around who could hear you, because some days you will need to play out fiery feelings, confusion, frustration, anger, and that can sound noisy and gnarly. Knowing you can make those sounds without worrying who hears is vital.

You can hold it as a meditation in motion

You can hold it as a meditation in motion

This is a spiritual and somatic practice as much as a musical one. A meditation in motion that asks you to make real decisions, moment by moment, staying wide open to what is around you while listening to what is rising from within.

You have reasonable expectations

You have reasonable expectations

You understand this is about a new kind of relationship with music, with sound, and with yourself. It is not about playing other people's music to other people's standards, the way some think music should be learned and played. Nothing stops you from pursuing that on your own. It is just not the point of this.

Deal breakers

The one real deal breaker

The one real deal breaker

This can work for anyone who wants to know what it feels like to tap their own creativity and musicality, and is willing to give it the time, attention, and care.

By now you have seen the things that are vital or helpful for that. There is really only one deal breaker, and even it can be worked through, if you are willing to entertain the possibility that you are wrong about it.

If you believe you do not have a musical bone in your body, or that some people are creative and others are not and you are in the "not" group, and you are fully committed to that belief, I am not going to argue with you about it.

As Henry Ford put it: "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right."

if this feels like you

Where to go from here

Where to go from here

If what you have read here feels like you, the next step is not more from me to explain. It is to follow whatever felt most alive as you read.

First, the why underneath it

If the page resonated, read about the philosophy that underlies this work. If, and only if, the philosophy makes sense to you, there is a much better chance this can actually help. That is worth knowing before we ever work together.

Read about My Philosophy →

Or just begin, with a small taste

If you would rather get a felt sense of how this works before deciding anything, start at one of the doors. Each one is a low-stakes way in, and each carries the same orientation. Pick whichever feels most like you.

Enter through the Listening door →

Enter through the Drum door →

Enter through the Piano door →

Or talk it through with me

If you would like to explore working together one to one, or the year-long immersion, let's get on a call and feel out whether there is a fit. No pressure either way. That is the whole point of a conversation.

Schedule a Curiosity Call →

IF NOT THIS

Not a fit after all? No problem.

Not a fit after all? No problem.

If you would like to believe a practice like this is possible for you, but you do not feel this is the one, or the timing is not right, here are some other good places to look:

  • Exploring listening quietly on your own, with the Listening Companions

  • An Artist's Way class

  • A class or workshop in improv theatre

  • A local drum circle (or gather a few friends and start one)

  • "The Listening Book" by W.A. Mathieu

  • "Write What You Don't Know" by Allegra Huston and James Navé

  • "Effortless Mastery" by Kenny Werner

  • "The Music Lesson" by Victor Wooten

Whether we end up working together or not, I hope this page has helped clarify a few things for you as you go.

Daniel Barber signature